1
No, no, leave it. It's, you know-
I'm sure you didn't mean any harm.

2
I'm sure it was just friendly banter.

3
I'm sure you guys have dicks
the size of peanuts. Enjoy your dinner.

4
The tuna's really good.

5
I shouldn't have done that.
I shouldn't have done that.

6
- No, you were brilliant.
- I'm rash and I'm stupid.

7
What am I doing with you?

8
Uh, I don't know, I'm afraid.

9
I don't either.

10
Here we are.

11
Yes.

12
- Well, look-
- Do you wanna come up?

13
Well, there seems to be...
lots of reasons why I shouldn't, so-

14
There are lots of reasons.

15
Do you wanna come up?

16
Give me five minutes?

17
- Hi.
- Hi.

18
To be able to do that
is such a wonderful thing.

19
- You've got to go.
- Why?

20
Because my boyfriend who was in America
is, in fact, now in the next room.

21
- Boyfriend?
- Yes.

22
- Baby, who is it?
- Uh, it's, uh-

23
- Uh-
- Uh, room service.

24
Oh. How you doing? I thought you guys
always wore those, uh, penguin coats.

25
Usually we do.

26
But I was just, uh-
just changed to go home.

27
And, um, then I thought
I'd take this final call.

28
Oh, great. If you don't mind,
I would like something too.

29
Could you bring me up some
really, really cold water?

30
I'll see what I can do.

31
- Still, not sparkling.
- Absolutely. Ice-cold still water.

32
Unless it's illegal in the U.K. to serve
beverages below room temperature.

33
I wouldn't want you going to jail
just to satisfy my whim, now.

34
- No, I'm sure it's
fine. - Thank you. - I-

35
Hey, one more thing. Could you adios these
dirty dishes and take out that trash too?

36
- Uh-
- Right.

37
No. No. Um, don't- don't-
don't do that.

38
I don't think
it's his job to clear.

39
Oh, I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
What's your name, man?

40
Bernie.

41
Oh, listen, Bernie.

42
Thank you.
I really appreciate it.

43
Hey, you.

44
So, tell me. Tell me, tell me.
Good surprise or nasty surprise?

45
- Good surprise.
- Oh, you're such a liar.

46
She hates surprises.
Hey, what are you gonna order?

47
- Huh?
- From him. What are you gonna order?

48
Um, I haven't decided yet.

49
Oh, well, don't overdo it.

50
I don't want people saying, "There goes that
famous actor with the big, fat girlfriend. "

51
I should leave.

52
This is a fairly strange reality
to be faced with.

53
I'm so sorry.

54
I don't know...

55
what to say.

56
Well,

57
I think, um,

58
"good-bye" is traditional.

59
I can think of younger days

60
When living for my life

61
Was everything

62
A man could want to do

63
I could never see

64
Tomorrow

65
I was never told

66
About the sorrow

67
And

68
How can you mend

69
A broken heart

70
How can you stop the rain
from falling down

71
Tell me how can you stop

72
That old sun from shining

73
What makes the world

74
Go round

75
- And
- Come on.

76
- How can you mend
- Open up.

77
This is me.
Spikey.

78
I'm in contact with some quite
important spiritual vibrations.

79
Come on.
Hit me with it.

80
- There's this girl-
- Aha.

81
See, I been getting a female vibe.
Good.

82
Speak on, dear friend.

83
She's someone who...

84
can't be mine, and, uh,

85
it's as if I've taken love heroin,
and now I can't ever have it again.

86
I've opened Pandora's box
and there's trouble inside.

87
Mmm.

88
Yeah.

89
Tricky.

90
I knew a girl at school
called Pandora.

91
Never got to see her box or-

92
Right.

93
Right. Thanks. That's very helpful.

94
You didn't know
she had a boyfriend?

95
No. No.

96
Why? Did you?

97
Oh, bloody hell.
I don't believe it.

98
My whole life ruined because
I don't read Hello magazine.

99
Let's face facts.
This was always a no-win situation.

100
Anna's... a goddess.

101
You know what happens to mortals
who get involved with the gods.

102
- Buggered, is it?
- Every time.

103
But don't despair. I think I have
the solution to your problems.

104
- Really?
- Mm-hmm. Her name is Tessa.

105
She works in the Contracts Department.

106
The hair, I admit,
is unfashionably frizzy,